Do you sometimes feel people are used and thrown?

From my own experience: "Good People" are good to themselves as well as to others. If you are good to yourself, you don't allow yourself to be "used". Subjugating all of your own dreams, desires, thoughts and needs in favor of someone else's is NOT good, unless you do it with no expectation of a return. If you feel "used" it is because your expectations aren't met. If you decide to sacrifice yourself, you aren't being "used", it is a decision you willingly made. 

You have a right to get a return on your investment (of love, time, affection, money, loyalty, work) but you need to express what you expect and hold the other party accountable. If give without getting and don't like it, the options are (1)to continue the status quo and continue your dissatisfaction, (2)stop giving, (3) define with the other party what the expectations are, or (4) give to someone or something that is appreciative in a way that pleases you.

This may seem like unsympathetic, but it isn't. The pain of being cast aside after devoting to something, and the above is what I learned from the experience. There are some people who can give without any expectation, and I think we all do that from time to time, but I don't see that working in an ongoing relationship, whether at work or at home or with friends. No one but you is responsible for your own happiness. If you feel cast aside, maybe you need to cultivate new friends, develop new interests or pursue old dreams. You are the only person who can "throw you out". You still exist and can still become happy with yourself.

Also some "good people" allow themselves to be used. They don't see the need or don't know how to set boundaries with others through their life. It's like killing yourself with your own kindness. (reverse of killing them with kindness) but it means the same thing...basically. 

If you allow others to walk over you and use you, it does not teach them how to respect others and they certainly won't respect you or really appreciate anything you do for them. You basically are teaching the users to continue to be users, not givers and you definitely are teaching them to use you. 

Then you wonder where all the people are that you were so kind to. Everything you did for these people over the years meant so very much to you, you really cared and assumed it meant the same to them and they were receiving with the same caring heart you were giving with. It's not good to judge others by your own standards because they just may not be the same.

However......you have your sweet kind heart, your integrity,honor and caring for others. That's really special in my book.

One of my big, difficult lessons in life, I am grateful I learned it.

Live each and every moment mindfully

Life with Aerobic vs Anaerobic Exercises

The literal meaning of aerobics is oxygen. Hence, aerobic exercise can be defined as the one, which involves the use of oxygen to produce energy, whereas anaerobic exercise makes the body to produce energy without using oxygen.


Anaerobic exercises are high intensity workouts that are performed for a short time. On the contrary, aerobic exercises generally simple exercises and are performed for a longer time, at moderate intensity.

Aerobic exercise is slow, steady state exercise that requires oxygen and can be done for long periods of time. Anaerobic exercise is short bursts of strength and power (weight training, plyometrics, high intensity running intervals) that last only 30-45 seconds.
Aerobic exercises train your muscles to use fat more efficiently, which causes them to burn less of it. The more you train, the easier the exercises get, and your body burns even less fat.
Anaerobic training is more effective and efficient for weight loss. It’s still cardiovascular, but you’re working at a greater intensity than aerobic training. Your heart and lungs get a workout because of the demand from the muscular system, rather than the reverse—your muscles moving because of cardiovascular demand. Anaerobic training requires greater muscular demand than aerobic training, thus elevating your heart rate and building fat-burning lean muscle.

When you perform aerobic exercise, you will notice an increase in the heart beat rate and the rise in your level of respiration. Energy is provided by carbohydrate and fats, when you work out the muscles. On the other hand, the sources of energy during anaerobic activity are adenosine tri phosphate (ATP) and creatine phosphate.
Choose to do aerobic or anaerobic to enjoy healthy life!

Celebrating Life

Xenotransplantation is the use of live nonhuman animal cells, tissues and organs in human patients. These cells can be implanted or enclosed in a device that is used outside the body ("ex vivo perfusion"). Lord Ganesha is the God of Xeno transplantation surgery. He is the elephant headed God. The birthday of Lord Ganesha is 'Ganesh Chaturthi' and this year it is celebrated on 19th Sep.

Today, with shortage of organs the world over, the attractive option of using animal organs is being explored all the time. If research could overcome rejection (antigen- antibody reaction), then, using animal body parts for humans could become a reality. Some examples of animal tissue that is used in the humans include heart valves that are derived from pigs.


Ganesha has an elephant’s head on the human body. The transplant is believed to have been performed by Lord Shiva. The scientific significance of Ganesha’s form may be interpreted as follows-
» Lord Ganesha looks abnormally obese, especially so in the regions of his abdomen and chest. After transplant surgery almost all patients receive steroids leading to a similar obesity. One wonders if Ganesha was on a long-term high dose of steroids after the transplant? No other Indian God is shown with this type of physique.

» Lord Ganesha’s accompanying mate is shown as a mouse – which sits infront or shown along with him. Most of the transplant research is done on mice before it is extrapolated on humans. There are reasons to ponder if the mouse is depicted for a purpose; giving the small animal its dues.

» After the transplant surgery, Lord Shiva is believed to have given Ganesha an elixir to drink. One cannot help speculating if this was some potion containing an anti-rejection medication. It is common practice to use similar booster anti-rejection drugs during transplant surgeries performed today.

Solid organ transplants are now common venture and almost any organ can be transplanted. Recently there have been instances of face transplants; however head transplant is the most complex of all transplants and no one has attempted this feat. Xeno-transplants of the head are unlikely to be used and can be only be confined to mythological stories such as that of Lord Ganesha.

Ganesha holds a unique niche in the minds of millions of devotees the world over. On the tenth day, the festivities of Ganesh Chaturthi meet a watery end, when clay idols of Ganesh are immersed in local water bodies. This is in accordance to the law of natural recycling.


These celebrations should also trigger thoughts that question their validity and prompt us to ponder on their significance, if any! Although we indulge in treason and murder, what makes us unique, as a race, is the ability to donate our body parts to revive a fellow human; the supreme sacrifice- to donate life! Let this be the presiding thought as we celebrate Ganesh Chaturthi this year and in the years to come.

Live Life to the Fullest!

"Life is not about chances, its about the choices you make" And it did quite sum up. Someone not so long ago asked "Why do we live life abiding by rules?" Answer was that it takes courage to break the mold and delineate oneself from the accepted norms of society and humanity as a whole. Pondering on the subject, maybe it is lack of courage sometimes, but many a times it takes character- playing by the rules even when your convictions are against them. It takes character to put other's needs, beliefs and welfare above your own.


That being said, life demands spontaneity and breaking away from the typical, every once in a while. Most people including are however used to planned decisions, calculated risks and anticipated outcomes. The most defining moments of  life were the choices made based on instincts, faith and convictions. Live each moment passionately and ardently within all notions and boundaries of right and wrong.

It was easy sometimes. You just have to find the one thing that you'd die for and then live for it. Some people might live to achieve it, others to sustain it and some others in search of it. No matter what the endeavor, it would have been worth it. After all, like some wise man once said "You go through life only once. But if you do it right, once is enough.

Past != Future

Ask soloists about their biggest achievements, and chances are high that they'll pause for a few moments and struggle to come up with one or two accomplishments -- along with qualifiers such as "But it didn't turn out quite the way I wanted..." or "It was OK, but I was hoping for more...."


But ask about their biggest mistakes, and  whew! the floodgates open. A laundry list of painful stumbles, costly oversights, and other failings is effortlessly recounted. Soloists learn by trial and error, and the lessons come from errors that aren't quickly forgotten.

Lately I've been thinking, however, that some mistakes hang around haunting soloists longer than they should. Sometimes a mistake is so painful that we can't see past it, and it influences decision-making situations long after the event is over.

The past does not equal the future. If you've made a  mistake in the past -- and who hasn't? -- and it still pains you, take a clear-headed look at how it's influencing your present, and future. Are you too quickly saying, "I'll never [fill in the blank]" to a situation that's related to a past stumble? If so, you may be cutting yourself off from important growth areas for yourself. Just because you stumbled once doesn't mean the next time you encounter a similar situation it will trip you up again.

While your solo budget may not have that much cushion for error, it's important to realize that mistakes are part of a learning curve. And if you're not learning, then your solo business surely will fail.

The past is past. Use it, learn from it, but don't let it hang around cluttering your psyche longer than it needs to. There are always new things to discover -- and new mistakes to be made!

Critical Life Skill:Learn to get back up every time you fall.

BABY giraffes never go to school. But they learn a very important lesson rather early in life. A lesson that all of us would do well to remember.

The birth of a baby giraffe is quite an earth-shaking event. The baby falls from its mother’s womb, some eight feet above the ground. It shrivels up and lies still, too weak to move.

The mother giraffe lovingly lowers her neck to smooch the baby giraffe. And then something incredible happens. She lifts her long leg and kicks the baby giraffe, sending it flying up in the air and tumbling down on the ground. As the baby lies curled up, the mother kicks the baby again. And again. Until the baby giraffe, still trembling and tired, pushes its limbs and for the first time learns to stand on its feet.

Happy to see the baby standing on its own feet, the mother giraffe comes over and gives it yet another kick. The baby giraffe falls one more time, but now quickly recovers and stands up. Mama Giraffe is delighted. She knows that her baby has learnt an important lesson: Never mind how hard you fall, always remember to pick yourself up and get back on your feet.

Why does the mother giraffe do this? She knows that lions and leopards love giraffe meat. So unless the baby giraffe quickly learns to stand and run with the pack – it will have no chance of survival. Most of us though are not quite as lucky as baby giraffes. No one teaches us to stand up every time we fall. When we fail, when we are down, we just give up. No one kicks us out of our comfort zone to remind us that to survive and succeed, we need to learn to get back on our feet.

 If you study the lives of successful people though, you will see a recurring pattern. Were they always successful in all they did? No. Did success come to them quick and easy? No, no! You will find that the common streak running through their lives is their ability to stand up every time they fall. The ability of the baby giraffe!

Have you heard about a young sales executive from Kolkata who dreamt about becoming an announcer on radio? He auditioned with All India Radio for a job. The authorities felt that he didn’t have a particularly good voice and he was rejected. He refused to accept defeat and continued to chase his dream.

He tried for a role in the movies. He got rejected. They thought he was too tall. He kept trying and got a few lucky breaks. But most of his early films flopped. He did not give up. He played an angry young man in a movie that became a super hit. And the failed radio announcer went on to become the country’s biggest superstar – widely admired for his baritone voice! His name? Amitabh Bachchan.

The road to success is never an easy one. There are several obstacles, and you are bound to fall sooner or later. You will hit a road block, you will taste failure. But success lies in being able to get up every time you fall. Thats a critical life skill. And its the habit of all successful people.

Learning to win in life is quite like learning to ride a bicycle. As you start to ride, you might fall and get bruised. It doesn’t matter. You need to get back up and continue to ride. Fall one more time? Get back up again. Thats all it takes. Learn to get back up every time you fall.

And just remember one more thing. Next time you find a friend or a parent kicking you, dont get upset with them. Like the mother giraffe, they may only be trying to teach you one of life’s most important lessons. It doesn’t matter how many times you fall. What matters is your ability to pick yourself up and stand on your feet once again.